Goal Stragegy

Welcome to my last blog of the year. I am taking December off from my blogs to finish up my book! I will still continue seeing clients and running my 6 week Intuitive Enhancement Mentorship, and in fact my next mentorship starts January 3. I can’t think of a better way to start off the new year than to give yourself 6 weeks to really focus on yourself, clear up your life, and become more connected to your intuitive skills so that you can make 2016 your most successful year! I’m always happy to talk to you about the mentorship if you are interested, and you can find more on my website.

I would like to leave us this year with a very powerful goal setting strategy. It’s what I am using currently as I climb the ladder to my dreams. So far, it has been flawless. Keep in mind, that anything you want, you can have. You just have to be willing to put your time and energy into it. I have found that so often we want something that we lack the wiliness to do the work for. And trust me; anything you work for will be worth it in the end.

So here are ways to ensure you meet your goals. Whether it be a rocken body, relationship, bank account, inner peace, career, hobby, a happy holiday season, or some “out there” wild wish- these will help!

1.       Find an empty lane. One of the best ways to feel great about what you are doing is to create the feeling that you are the only one doing it! I’ve heard for years from successful people that if you want to make a difference in the world, find a problem and solve it. That doesn’t mean that your entire idea has to be original, it just means that you solve it in the way that YOU would solve it. Be original, quirky, different, and really put yourself out there. Even if there are others doing what you want to be doing, they won’t be in your lane doing it the way you can do it.

2.       Run as if you have a million dollars, even if you have zero. This doesn’t mean to get yourself into debt. It means that in order for you to stay motivated and on task, you can’t let the money issues get you down or stop you. Starting most anything requires at least a little bit of cash. But, if you sit around waiting for money to show up in order for you to go after your dreams, you’ll never go after them. There will never be enough money… so just decide that you’re going to feel as if you have enough right now.

3.       Feel and be good at what you do- have confidence. I have a saying, “you can’t cover up a bad cake with sweet icing.” If you’re not sure of yourself to the core, there won’t be enough make-up, status updates, or fake smiles to cover it up for long. You’re way more transparent than you realize. So just be real and if you’re not feeling 100% don’t be afraid to tell people. Your audience, friends, and family want authenticity more than they want perfection. Personally, I’d rather eat a well baked cake that looked less than perfect, than a well iced cake that tasted horrible.

4.       Motivate yourself EVERY DAY! You cannot over-motivate yourself. Get yourself an awesome playlist of music that gets you going, listen to powerful speakers on YouTube, have a list of things to do that make you feel better, and engage in things that feed your soul and make your heart sing! I cannot stress enough that you must do this EVER DAY!!!

5.       Know that there are people cheering for you. Sometimes your cheerleaders aren’t as loud as your naysayers, but they are there. No matter what you are doing, you can find someone who believes in you if you look around and give people a chance to support you. Let the right people know about your goals, and let them cheer you on. It’s the best feeling in the world to know that even though some people won’t be able to figure you out, others don’t necessarily need to in order to be on your side.

6.       Work smart, work consistently, and take the good with the ugly. Not much else to say on this one. Just get out there and do the work! And if you have a bad day, have a little pity party then get over it. If you’re doing 1-5, it’ll be easier to get your “badassery” on, brush yourself off, and get back to it.

I’m looking forward to spending December finishing up my book and seeing what my editor does to it. J I’m also looking forward to continuing my Periscopes every Monday for the card of the week. If you haven’t downloaded Periscope yet, you’re missing out! It’s the fastest and most informative app out there. I’ve really appreciated the time and effort my own mentors have put into their valuable content on there.

And of course, if you want more clarity, motivation, and insight, visit my website at www.clarityistheway.com. You’ll get access to my YouTube channel and all of my social media platforms that I will continue to update.  

Make December a magical month of peace and joy. It’s up to you. No matter what your situation is, whether you are surrounded by people or all alone, whether you are feeling the spirit of the season or not, you are in control of your experience and how you choose to act, react, and feel. Find something that you want to do in life, and let it be so big that it scares you. Follow your intuition, and make it happen. January will be here in no time, and what you do this month can set you up for a year beyond your wildest imagination!

And remember that clarity is power! You can live a life of grace and ease when you make powerful decisions based on clarity. Clarity truly is the way, my friends. Happy Holidays to you! 

Are You Scared or Just Not Ready?

Are you scared or are you just not ready?  How to know if you are equipped for success.

People tell me their fears. And it’s my job to listen to them. Fear is not something to be judged, it seems very real until we uncover the gift or awareness it hides. It is my job to help people take a look at what hides beneath their fears and when they do, beautiful things emerge.

One thing that has always caught my attention is the fear of taking the next step- in anything. The fear of going forward in a relationship, the fear of opening up your own business, the fear of going for the promotion, the fear of having a baby, the fear of making an investment, buying a house, moving, the fear of starting a new eating plan, the fear of getting a personal trainer, the fear of doing anything new, or the fear of hiring a life coach. The list goes on, but you get the point. There is always the next step. There is always something we want to do- and there is always fear standing at the doorway guarding our precious outcome.

When it comes to taking your next step, very often the fear is because we simply haven’t taken the time to learn what it is we need to be doing. A personal example would be that when I had an idea to write a book I immediately began doing research. I spoke to people who went into self publishing vs a publishing company. I spoke to people in writers groups, editors, etc. I began doing research on the topic of my book, and wrote the outline with facts and ideas. The more I learned about my next step, the less fear I had about taking it.

Fear is normal. But so are love, passion, drive, excitement, and power. In my experience, when your desire is enough, it trumps the need for safety and then you’re able to say, “I feel this fear, but I am doing it anyway!” Normal fear might make you hesitate, but won’t stop you.  If you feel truly stuck, perhaps it’s because you are not ready.  Your fear may be tricking you into thinking that you are confused at what your next step may be. There is no such thing as “I don’t know what to do next.” This is the information age. You can google anything. You have information at your fingertips, and countless people to watch and talk to.

Here are some things to consider as you overcome fear by becoming more informed:

• How much do you really know about what you want to do?
• How much studying have you done on what you want to do? 
• How prepared are you?
• Do you feel qualified?
• Do you feel knowledgeable?
• How bad do you want it?
• The next steps of your life are really contingent on your relationships.  Who do you surround yourself with?
• What do you have that is different than anyone else?
• Find your message and don’t be embarrassed by your story, the people you are here to serve will be attracted to your message.
• Forget and forgive your past. Who cares if you’ve failed already? The next step is a new step- fresh and ready for your action!

The more you know, the less fear you feel. Ask yourself, “Am I scared or am I just not ready?” If you're just  not ready, then you know where to start! Your next steps are in preparation as you gather your resources, information, and equip yourself with power by getting the information you need.

For more on how to get clear about your next step and how to take massive action towards your dreams and goals, find me at www.clarityistheway.com

Remember, clarity is powerful. You can live a life of grace and ease when you make powerful decisions based on CLARITY!

You can also follow me on your favorite social media platforms @clarityistheway, find me on YouTube for awesome videos and join me on Periscope for live interactions every Monday and Wednesday noon MST. 

2 Things That Fuel Motivation

Just Some Good ‘ol Motivation For You.

To be motivated is to have the power that pushes you toward taking action and toward achievement. Where there is motivation, there is clarity, initiative, direction, courage, energy, and the persistence to follow your goals.

So what happens if you begin to lose motivation for something you were once so fired up about? Why does this happen?

Think of motivation like a fire, and in order to keep a fire burning you need things to burn, right?  There are two things in particular that will keep your fire burning: Commitment and perseverance.

Commitment is doing something you said you would do, after you no longer want to do it. A lot of people mistake commitment for ‘’interested.’’  When you are highly interested in something you’ll do whatever is convenient.  But when you are truly committed, you’ll do whatever it takes for success. It’s a good idea to ask yourself before committing to something if you are truly committed or if you are just highly interested.  This will help you prioritize and be honest with anyone else who may be involved. 

When your commitment is being challenged, think back to why you started in the first place. Get in touch with your “why.”  Once you remember why you started in the first place, your fire will begin burning again.

Perseverance is the ability to continue doing something when you feel tired, worn out, and run down.  It’s the internal overdrive that kicks into place when you feel like quitting. Perseverance requires practice. Just like a marathon runner, you build your ability to go longer and harder.  You do this by continually reaching your limits over and over until you learn how to go beyond them. Don’t mistake building perseverance with burning out.  Burnout is when you go beyond your limits before you build perseverance.  A good thing to keep in mind while building your endurance levels- there’s a difference between reaching up and stressing out. One feels like you’re overcoming resistance, the other feels like you are abusing yourself. Even though you might be tired, building perseverance will always feel like you’re accomplishing something.

When your perseverance is being challenged, reach for empowerment. Pat yourself on the back for overcoming obstacles. Celebrate your small accomplishments. Acknowledge you are doing more than you ever thought you would. 

If you are willing to build your perseverance and practice commitment, you will consistently be feeding your fire of motivation.  As long as you are motivated, you will find every resource you need to finish. Motivation is KEY to your success.  Stay in the game, my friend. You’ll be happy you did!

For more clarity, please visit my NEW AND IMPROVED website at www.clarityistheway.com

Find me on all of your favorite social media platforms @clarityistheway

Live on Periscope every Monday and Wednesday noon MST.

The Art of Inquiry

Inquiry is the art of asking the right questions in order to get effective answers. It is a formal investigation to determine the facts. Inquiry, when used to gain personal insight can be the most important and effective tool to self improvement.

The fact is that the reason you are not clear about what changes to make is that you have not investigated yourself enough.

The fact is that the reason you have not investigated yourself is because you are afraid of what you might find; you’re afraid to change.  

The fact is that the longer you put off inevitable change, the longer you will be in pain. And if you’re totally honest with yourself, you are in pain about what needs to change.

Where to start.

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “Know Thyself,” or “self awareness is everything.” But what you may not know is that self awareness requires a lot of compassion.  It’s hard to be aware of the truth if you’re just going to use it to beat up on yourself.  Let yourself off the hook, and just take a look!  You can’t make changes until you know the truth.

The Inquiry.

 If you want to figure out what is really important to you, look at the evidence.  Go back over your history and what you’ve been doing.

The honest answers to these questions will help you get closer to knowing yourself, and where to begin making changes. Spend serious time pondering each question.  If you don’t like the answers, change!

1.       Your Environment: What do you fill your primary work or personal space with? Look around- these are things that are the most important to you. Does your physical environment reflect who you really are? Does it express your goals and your potential?

2.       Your Time: What is the first, second, third activity of the day? What are your daily priorities? How many hours a day do you work? Do you read or study?  How are you spending the rest of your day? Who do you spend the most hours with during the day? Where are you during the biggest chunks of your day? Does your spent time reflect where you truly want to be and what you truly want to be doing?

3.       Your Self Image: Do you like who you see in the mirror? What is your favorite thing about your face? Your body? How would you like to see yourself? How would you like your body to feel? Do people see you the way you want them to? Does your body, clothing, and appearance reflect how you truly want to be treated?

4.       Your Passions: What energizes you? What are you doing when you lose track of time? If money or work were not an issue, what would you do all day? How often do you engage in something that really lights you up?

5.       Your Priorities: Write a list of all of your activities, hobbies, and obligations. Then number them with 1 representing what you love the most. Are the top 3 things you numbered where you spend the most of your mental focus? How much energy do you devote to things you truly love?

6.       Your Results: What have your life results been?  Are they in line with what you are wanting? Results show you what you are truly committed to. Perhaps it’s time for a reality check- you may be subconsciously committed to failure if that is what your result has been.

Cost vs. Benefits.

As you look over your answers, try to identify what answers repeat most often, is there a theme of things you are satisfied or unsatisfied with? Change usually doesn’t happen until you realize that it is costing you more to stay in the unhealthy pattern than you are benefiting from it. Don’t be afraid to begin a pros and cons list to making a change you’re scared to make. Once you see just how far the scales are tipping, you may begin to take action to create balance.

Is there a change you are trying to make but have been unsuccessful at? I can help. To get more clarity, please visit me at www.clarityistheway.com

Follow me on all of your social media platforms @clarityistheway and don’t miss my LIVE Periscope every Wednesday noon MST for your Mid-week Motivation. 

Why All The Woo-Woo?

This blog is in response to a number of my health clients who are wondering why I am taking my brand and my business into other topics. People may think that health and self development are on opposite ends of the spectrum, however I have found that how you do one thing is how you do all things. Our lives are not compartmentalized. Non-success in one area of your life will affect everything! But, if you want to be truly successful in anything, you must be willing to dig deep to see where you’re sabotaging your success and enhance your ability to use your intuition to make powerful life changing decisions based on clarity. In my experience, most successful people allow themselves to be guided by their “gut feelings” even if it seems out of the box and"woo woo." Moving through life without developing the use of intuition is like walking around with your eyes and ears closed. It becomes scary, and easy to make a wrong turn. Truth is, everyone has the ability to look ahead with their eyes, ears, and heart wide open and reap all of the benefits from doing so. I am someone who can assist you to open up, discover your life passions, and attain goals you may not have been able to before. Through my own personal transformation, I have seen that in healing the core of who I am, I am able to create healthy habits, be successful, and share my gifts with the world. So, if you're wondering why all the woo woo, here it is...

Woo-woo is a derogatory and dismissive term used to refer to beliefs one considers nonsense or to a person who holds such beliefs. Sometimes woo-woo is used by skeptics as a synonym for pseudoscience, true-believer, or quackery. It has unfortunately been used for the majority of my life to describe myself and a lot of my personal beliefs.

However, let’s be honest. The phrase is really used when describing anything out of the majority’s beliefs and actions. You see, we have this box labeled “normal” and everything in that box has a stamp of approval on it by some sort of larger organization that you have given the power of that stamp to. Whether it is your government, educational system, religion, or even your family, the truth is that as long as you remain in the box of “normal,” you’re letting other people stamp what’s “normal” for you and what you should deem as “woo woo.”

If you are feeling discomfort by those last two paragraphs, I beg you to read on, as that is surely a sign something is stirring within you to understand why all the woo woo.

In 1970, Maslow came up with a chart to describe some very out of the box findings about the human psyche and needs from our basic survival to an enlightened evolution. He even coined the term Self Actualization- a very taboo topic for the time period.  However, as time has gone on, his theory has made it closer and closer to the stamp of approval and into your box of “normal.”

As you can see, the lower half of the triangle consists of some very in the box “normal” and basic things that people have no problems discussing. Work, school, church, family, traditions, holidays, marriage, what kind of house you have, food, car you drive, and etc.  However, as you near the top, conversations will waiver because there are so many ideas for how to become Self Actualized. This involves more of an internal dialogue with topics such as, “Who am I really? What am a truly passionate about? Why am I here? What do I yearn to create? Do I have enough love? Do I understand the universe which I exist in? How do I heal the past? Why am I not as happy and successful as I want to be and do I even deserve what I want?”

In my experience, if you want the latter questions answered, many times you have to journey outside of the box of “normal.”  We go from this conversation: “I’m not sleeping, time to take a pill.” To: “What is it about my life that is creating restless nights? Is there something deeper going on with me?”  

To anyone inside of the box of “normal,” that last question is woo-woo. They will tell you that you’re thinking too deep about it, and to just take the pill and go to sleep. The top half of the triangle requires you to begin to develop yourself. It doesn’t involve anyone else.  That is why we call it self-development, not “everyone else-development.”

Self-development is personal. It requires you to go within and to begin to listen to a different direction than the ones who own the stamp of approval.  This is because those organizations cannot possibly know what “becoming everything a person is capable of becoming” will look like for every single person. When a person steps outside of the box of “normal,” they enter the world of woo woo.

Most of you reading this probably think that the world of woo-woo requires you to do weird ceremonies, talk to spirits, burn incense and sage, meditate with crystals, drink weird detoxing teas, eat organic nuts and seeds, climb mountains to find shamans, and talk to psychics. While I’m all for trying new adventures (for the mere fun of it), here is the truth about those of us who have bravely stepped outside of the box. 

People who truly step into the world of woo-woo and successfully find self-actualization have had to do the following:

1.    They had to reprioritize their lives. While inside of the box, they were told where and how to spend their time. However, at some point within the world of woo woo, they were willing to be honest about what they were truly passionate about. And then they honored those priorities, even if the naysayers scoffed at them.

2.    They had to overcome the barriers to being successful.  At some point, they recognized a tendency to sabotage themselves and stay small. They saw how fear was holding them back, and they had to take steps to overcome their limitations.

3.    They had to understand not only their strengths, but also their weaknesses. It was hard for them to admit where they needed help. In business, it might mean that they hired someone to do something they aren’t good at. In relationships, it might mean that they had to ask their partner for patience. In health, it might mean they had to hire a trainer or health coach. Even though it was hard, being honest with themselves and then asking for help balanced their lives and made it easier.

4.    They had to heal the past, and stay aware of any past issues that arise to limit their success in any way. They learned how to be relentless in forgiving and the importance of being present.

5.    They have had to take accountability. They have had to apologize, admit when they were wrong, and take accountability for all of the discord they have created in their lives. This means that they had to get VERY honest and raw with themselves.

6.    They had to get healthy. At some point, they recognized that the health of their body affects everything. They understand that if the body is not clear from toxins and addictions, it doesn’t function physically, emotionally, or cognitively. This will spill over into how they conduct themselves in business and relationships and block creativity and motivation.

7.    They have had to acquire a personal relationship to a higher source, one that is completely outside of scripture or another person’s experience of the Divine. They have had very deep, honest, authentic conversations with God and have even faced their anger and fears about Him. They may have even rejected the idea of a God in order to start over and develop a more authentic relationship where the old one may have been based on fear and misunderstandings.

8.    They have been empowered. At a basic level, the term 'empowerment' simply means 'becoming powerful'.  Building personal empowerment involved reflecting on their personal values, skills and goals and being prepared to adjust their behavior in order to achieve goals. Personal empowerment also means being aware that other people have their own set of values and goals which may different than theirs.

9.    They have felt the calling to contribute. They see where problems exist and they use their out of the box, woo woo mentality to solve them.  

10.  They have changed their language. Woo woo people talk differently because they know how powerful words are. They understand that what you put out there, you get back. Therefore, they tend to use positive, uplifting verbiage and are careful not to listen to negativity either. Rarely do they use low vibration words that are slang or crude.  They are very intentional in their speech, honoring their words as law.

11.  They have had to forgive those who stay in the box of “normal.” Being judged, disowned, scoffed and laughed at is simply a rite of passage for those who decide they want more out of life. Interestingly enough, it is completely within the “high standards” of the box of “normal” to shame, guilt, fight, and make fun of others. A lot of “normal” people see the world of woo woo as weak when they have no idea that it actually takes more strength to commit to peace than to war.

So, where’s all the quackery?  I thought we were explaining the weirdo hippies who talk to angels and dance naked in the forest! The things on that list are too benign, that can’t be woo-woo!

What we in the woo woo world do in order to achieve the results we desire and are inspired to achieve are no matter to those who are within the box. We know that in order to live a truly authentic, forgiving, innovative, creative, connected, fun, and clear life you gotta get a little weird and that’s okay. Who cares if somebody wants to use a deck of oracle cards instead of a book to get inspiration? What does it matter if they choose to sit under a tree and fish on a Sunday because they recognize the need to spend time where they feel totally at peace? And what of the person climbing the mountain to speak to the shaman in a sweat lodge? These are simply signs of self discovery that lead to self actualization. What these weird woo woos bring back to our simple and closed minded society are colorful stories, painted awareness, rich experiences, and innovative world changing ideas that will undoubtedly shake another person out of the box. The world of woo woo is juicy, fun, and liberating. It is also long hard nights of sweat and tears as we shed the old life of pain and emerge with wings spread wide. It is daring to be who we were before the world told us who to be, and living that so fiercely that we no longer care what others think. It is taking the leap of faith and doing that which scares us but calls to us at the same time. It is having the honest conversations, first with ourselves and then with others. And ya, it’s clearing our energy, meditating, doing yoga, and eating weird healthy stuff. Most of all, it’s learning how to mind our own business and stay out of the way of someone climbing Maslow’s Triangle in their own style and flare. If the end result produces a balanced, happy, successful individual who is doing what they were born to do, then woo woo!

For more information on all my woo woo stuff, visit my website at www.clarityistheway.com 

Find me on your favorite social platform @clarityistheway

Follow me on Periscope for LIVE motivation! 

The Downtime

2008, 7 years ago- I had rushed into an unhealthy high drama relationship right after a divorce. I was also starting a new business with 2 business partners- an experience I was very unfamiliar with and tested my confidence, self worth, and skills on a daily basis. I was all over the place. I wasn’t eating, I wasn’t sleeping, I lived on coffee, and I was stressed out over time and money. I felt pulled in a thousand directions. In my mind, I thought that as long as I was going through the “right” motions that I was doing fine. Get up, put on the heels and make up, smile, go to work, pay bills, make sure everyone is happy, etc… that it was enough. It wasn’t until a very sudden and unexpected series of panic attacks 3 years later that would debilitate me for hours and sometimes days that I began to question the way I was choosing to live my life.  I had to face the fact that I no longer wanted to do what I was doing- in any area of my life. I was unhappy at work, I was stressed out at home, I felt like a terrible mother because I was spread so thin between a failing business that I secretly hated and other peoples drama, my body was constantly sore even though I wasn’t working out, and my priorities were completely upside down but I felt lost as to how to reorganize the mess I was in. At the time, I didn’t yet have the tools to understand the signs and symptoms of burn out. The panic attacks were a sign that my body was crying out for rest. My mind was crying for silence. My heart was crying for healing. Where does one find the reset button?

The secret that was missing from my life that completely helped me to shift and reorganize myself was within some essential and much avoided downtime. I believe we live in a society that expects us to be 100% all of the time. When we constantly push ourselves way past our limits, we end up becoming less productive, hence the need to unnecessarily work harder to fix things we messed up in our tired and stressed out state. We lack the time and energy to address and make positive changes and the build up from that can become unbearable. Stress causes certain hormones to be released in our body that make us unclear in our minds, over reactive, and cover up emotions that tell us to rest and recover. I think more people are functioning in a burnt out mind-state than we realize. Humans were not meant to be robots or machines. We require downtime.  Without it, we begin to slowly shut down and lose control over our lives.

Some physical symptoms of burn out are sudden weight increase or decrease, increased resting heart rate, headaches, sleep disturbances, irritability and overreactions, dehydration, pain, low immune system and illness, hair loss, nail biting, sugar/food/alcohol/caffeine/drama/& substance addiction, accidents, negativity/worry/fear/panic/anxiety, and poor performance in any or all areas of your life.

Eventually, I had to learn how to listen to my body’s signs and signals that it was time for downtime. We all have cycles and rhythms and I began to learn to recognize when my body was in a down cycle- which just simply means to redirect my focus on receiving to balance the giving. Just like your breath, you are inhaling and exhaling right now- a perfect balance of input and output. If this cycle is disrupted, you fail to live. If your personal cycle of input and output is disrupted, you fail to live as well. Recognizing the need for downtime means that we begin to honor our cycles and admit as individuals and as a culture that it is completely ridiculous and insane to think we will always be 100% without the right breaks. We don’t expect our cars to function without stopping to fill up their gas tanks and make sure the oil is right. Animals don’t naturally push themselves to exhaustion, they innately know that in order to be productive in hunting, they need to rest first. We are no different. As soon as I stopped the insanity, I recovered my life. I replaced the panic attacks with gentle self care. The reset button is worth pushing.  Not only is it normal and okay to say “STOP” and to find your “NO,” it is absolutely imperative to draw healthy boundaries to drama and overexertion.

 Downtime is not “crashing”. Crashing is symptomatic- where we have worked ourselves into an automatic situation where we engage in oversleeping, illness, accidents, or in my case, panic attacks.  Crashing is non productive, there is nothing that rejuvenates or realigns you during a crash. Another form of crashing is engaging an addiction to a stimulant or a sedative.  Neither of which help you to regain the mental clarity and physical capacity to make the necessary changes you’re avoiding. Zoning out on social media or TV is also NOT an effective way to reboot. You may be “resting” however laziness is more of a result from overworking when the pendulum swings in the opposite direction and rarely does anyone feel energetic, clear and ready to take on their lives after a Netflix binge.

Here are the essentials if you want a productive downtime. 

1.       De-stress: Functioning under a constant burden of stress is like trying to fly an airplane with the wheels unlocked and the flaps down. There’s more ‘drag’ and greater resistance against which much of your energy is wasted. De-stressing means that we are deflating or letting go of burdens. Practice just letting go. Either through meditation or through prayer, talking to someone or writing down everything on your mind so that you can “get it out of your head”. In extreme cases of stress, you may even have to leave a situation to detach and let go.

2.       Creativity: Your best ideas often pop-up when you’re most relaxed and in free thinking mode. While working under adverse conditions may provide an adrenaline surge to meet deadlines, it really isn’t a great way to spur creativity. The most successful people I know take time to just daydream and visualize. They lie out in the sun, spend time reading an inspiring book, or just simply gaze out of a widow and daydream. You can also indulge in a creative endeavor like painting, music, or dancing. I recently received a grown up coloring book as a gift, and I love the things I consider and dream about while losing myself in creativity. By the way, daydreaming is NOT worrying. It’s using your imagination to visualize the success or outcome of a project. It promotes relief and rest.

3.       Evaluate and Assess: Taking time to relax lets you review your performance and see how well things are going. What needs adjustment? Is something out of balance? Are you doing what needs to be done? Who can you delegate to? These answers are easier to find while you relax. This honest reassessment time is valuable to your happiness and success as it leads you to make corrections to stress-forming habits and situations.

4.       Celebrate: Taking time in your hectic schedule to break away from work and rejoice in what you’ve accomplished can be a forceful drive to achieve even more. If you can’t do this daily, shoot for at least once a week. And if you can’t find something big to celebrate, celebrate the small ones! Once I was able to list my priorities, it was easy to see where I needed to spend most of my time. It also became easy to accomplish things because I knew I would celebrate and congratulate myself for marking things off of lists and completing tasks. Bringing fun into your day is an essential part of honoring your downtime.

5.       Rejuvenate: While routine creates success and security, a short ‘vacation’ from the hustle and bustle of your typical work-day can help ignite the passion and excitement that got you started and fired you up in the early days. Capture that spirit, in a small way, through relaxing breaks from the routine. Other ways you can rejuvenate are to leave your building for lunch, go for a walk, try something new, take a scenic drive home, get a massage or some sort of pampering, engage in yoga or workout to release stress from your body and rejuvenate your cells. Hydrate!

6.       Honor bedtime: It is crazy to me to think that we can go from watching screens, being in bright lights, and having noise all around us and expect that our systems will just shut down because our head is all of the sudden on a pillow at bedtime. One of the best changes I ever made was to honor the downtime we all need every single night. 30 mins before bedtime turn the screens off and dim the lights. Do things that will inspire sleep like essential oils in a bath, tea, reading (an organic book with pages, not a kindle or tablet), stretching, writing in a journal, and meditation. Allowing a consistent downtime of actual rest and relaxation before bed might just be the best thing you ever do!

7.       “When you get nervous, focus on service”: I love this saying from Doreen Virtue and the angels. Sometimes the best way to honor our downtime is to get out of our own lives, and serve the needs of others. One of the reasons I love my job is that I get to delve into other peoples lives and help them create their own success. Being able to share in other peoples breakthroughs and positive changes really inspires me, it fills my cup, and definitely rejuvenates me.

The point of honoring your downtime is to give you time away from your mundane life so that when you return, you do it with vigor, new insight and ideas, and the energy to be even more productive and successful. Great managers and bosses recognize that overworking employees just doesn’t work.  They will get way more out of the people who work for them when they allow adequate breaks and downtime. You will find the same thing about yourself.  Just as I have implemented downtime into my life, you will also find that you can finally accomplish the things you have been talking about, achieve more than you thought you would, and most of all ENJOY what you are doing and who you are becoming.  Downtime is important; it’s necessary, and life changing.  

What can you do today- RIGHT NOW- to honor your body’s natural cycles? 

Clarity is powerful, you can live a life of grace and ease when you make powerful decisions based on CLARITY!

For more amazing insight through motivational coaching, check out my website at www.clarityistheway.com and follow me on your favorite social media sites @clarityistheway.

Join me for my LIVE mid-week Periscope every Wednesday at noon MST.  

The Players in Your Game

His hands are steady and firm against the leathery ball, his breath is heavy and strong. His mind is focused, there is nothing else going on in his world but this one thing. He yells out to his team, like a war cry, and it begins. Everything happens fast, the battle opens, and strategies are executed.   He is looking over a sea of helmets to find an open warrior. Sweat stings his eyes, he has to be on point, dodging danger, relying on his men to keep him safe. Searching… searching…and then finally his warrior is there, open… good God how is he open in this chaos? The man blinks, his focus like a laser beam.  The ball is launched like a torpedo, cutting the air above an ocean of conflict just before he is taken down under the weight of an angry animal who has somehow broken free from his men’s defense. Below the spinning weapon, the clashing of titans, the fervent unyielding determination of giants and heroes brings a stadium of thousands to their feet. The noise waves over the fast beating hearts, assaults, and fresh wounds.  The ball finds its destination in the anticipating arms of the warrior who will do whatever it takes in his power to run it the rest of its way to victory.

This is how a poetic woman watches football. It’s becoming more than just a game for me. But, what can I say; very often things are not what they seem to those of us who think deeply.  It’s something my boyfriend enjoys, and as I have taken interest, I have learned a lot.  Not just about football, but how we can apply it to our lives.

There are certain things about any game that make it successful, and what I’d like to bring to light today is how important every single person who contributes to the game is. Just like in the game of football, there has to be certain people involved in your life for you to be a success. 

I’ve noticed that successful people are very deliberate in who they surround themselves with. If you were a player in a football game, certain people would be playing certain roles to help you be a hero.  They are also the same roles you need people to play in your everyday life to help you reach success.

A Mentor: Someone who has attained something you want to attain and has perhaps attained it in so many different ways that they have a wealth of knowledge, experience, and wisdom to offer you. Mentors are ahead of you in some way, perhaps they’ve just been doing it longer, or they have found ways to further themselves in the areas you’re looking to improve. Everyone needs a mentor.  Even mentors need mentors-someone to look up to, someone who is paving the way. A good mentor will be someone who is not in competition with you, but someone who has made their way through something and now has the drive to help others.

A Coach: Someone who may not necessarily be better than you in your trade, but knows the rules and the game so well that they can give you step by step instructions on how to be successful.  They are down on the playing field with you, however from the sidelines they can see a bigger picture, perhaps one you can’t see while you’re in it. A coach will push you to your greatness, they will help you find what position to play, and motivate you to keep going when it gets tough. A good coach will believe in you enough to challenge you and help you break through your own limitations so that you can be the best player out there.

A Healer: I’ve noticed the team of doctors, physical therapists, massage therapists, and even Reiki practitioners who are a part of a player’s recovery.  Your life is no different.  Sometimes it’s brutal out there and you need to take time to heal yourself. I’m a firm believer in receiving energy and body work, and quite honestly had it not been through healing therapies, I would have never gotten over certain heart brakes and life traumas. This also includes health coaching and nutritional counseling. Just because you read an article on facebook about green tea doesn’t mean you know a thing about nutrition.  However, there are people who dedicate their lives to knowing how your body interacts with foods, healthy supplements and exercise.  “Go with your gut,” and find someone who can help you balance your physical health to fit your lifestyle.  A good healer works with your body, mind, and energy system, to bring it back into alignment, health, homeostasis, and will fill you up again when you’ve been drained.

Cheerleaders: These are basically “yes men.” You need someone in your life who knows how to cheer you on. Someone whom you can do no wrong in their eyes. Someone who believes in you no matter how many times you fall on your face. These people can help you spread your goodness, they can help you market, and their dedication to your success keeps you going because you can’t let them down.

An Audience: This may seem like a weird one at first, because I think we innately don’t want an audience.  Most people I coach feel like they want to be seen and accepted, but they are conflicted by not wanting to be seen because they fear they won’t be accepted.  Here’s how I see it- You need an audience.  And half of them can be rooting for you, and its okay if the other half are not.  All of the naysayers of your life are simply rooting for something else.  Trust me, I have haters. I’m keenly aware of the people who are “booing” me from the stands and that some of them may even be reading this blog! But I see them as part of my audience who are just rooting for another team. For instance, if my happiness and success gets a “booooo” from the stands, I just assume these are the people who are rooting for unhappiness and scarcity.  Definitely not my team! Then just like a football player, I shake it off and hike the ball again. Football players don’t stop what they are doing when the other teams fans are mean to them. They don’t climb up the stairs of the stadium and confront the fans, nor do they change what they are doing because of them. If you have haters, watch football. Do what they do.  Can they even hear the naysayers while they are busy doing their touchdown dance?

Finally, you need other players.  Who are your team mates? And who is your opposition?  Your teammates will huddle up with you and do their part of the strategy for touchdowns.  These can be family members, people in your inner circles, close friends, and it can even be your guardian angels and ancestors who want your success.  Your opposition will be the opposing force to which you have to bust through to get your touchdowns.  Your opposition doesn’t necessarily have to be another person, perhaps it’s your own inner fears and limitations.  Sometimes it takes a whole team to bust through your own darkens, but when you have passed that goal line and your crowd goes wild… you know you’ll never be the same.

Whatever game or goal you are playing for, it’s important to have the kind of support that will get you to your own hall of fame.  It’s important to practice, practice, practice, to have a strategy and to play hard. And don’t forget that time-outs are important too so make sure to take those!

The best way to make powerful decisions in your game is to get very CLEAR. Check out my website and all I can offer you at www.clarityistheway.com

Follow me on your favorite social media platforms @clarityistheway and join me for a LIVE Periscope every Monday and Wednesday noon MST for more motivation!

The Ripple Effect

Someone somewhere at some point has prayed for you.

Maybe it wasn’t a formal prayer, maybe it was simply a well wishing, or maybe you were included in some stranger’s general prayer for world peace.  Or perhaps it was a fervent on-the-knees-contrite –with –broken-heart sort of prayer. No matter how it came across, I can guarantee you someone at some point sent you some good vibes through a thought or feeling. Because at some point in your life, whether you meant to or not, you meant something to someone and they wanted life to be good for you.

Do you ever stop and wonder what kind of effect that has had on your life? Someone has cared about you, have you ever wondered how that has changed you?

I’m a firm believer that my love changes things. I’ve seen it happen- when I focus my love on anything or anyone, things change… and always for the better. It’s amazing how quickly things turn around when I pour on my love. And I am 100% confident that the ripples from the outpouring of my love reach the ends of the earth. Facetious? I think not.  After all, it’s scientifically proven.

The ripple effect is a scientifically proven phenomenon that states that every action causes a series of effects that expand outwards incrementally. Like a pebble being thrown into a pond the ripples form waves outwards forming a beautiful circular pattern of ripples. The most famous example of the ripple effect is shown through economics where an individual’s reduction in spending reduces the incomes of others and their ability to spend. Everything we do, every decision we make, changes the world around us and that is the ripple effect.

I’ve learned from working with people that on some level, everyone wants to make a difference.  Everyone in their own way wants to send out ripples of their goodness.  And yet far too often we find ourselves in the midst of negative ripples. Think of a negative ripple effect. Maybe someone at a store who set you off and not only did you never go back, but you told everyone about the bad service. Think about the person who set you off, and because of your negative reaction, they went home and treated someone the way you treated them, and then that person created chaos for the next and so on. One interaction gone wrong and negative ripples were sent out in all directions affecting more people than you can imagine. But, if this is not what we truly want to happen in our world, why do we continue causing these ripples?

We are unconscious of the power of the ripple effect.  We might “get it”, (oh ya, Crystal wrote a cute piece about how we affect the world around us, so nice…) but we don’t truly understand it because if we did we would begin to understand the importance of stopping negative ripples in their tracks.

You have to be in control of your ripples.  Know why? Because just like in the example above, with a stone being cast into water, eventually those ripples will reach a rebound point and come back for you. The stronger the waves you put out there, the more momentum they will have when they hit their bounce back point and guess what that means for you and everyone who was in between you and your rebound point? Have you ever caught yourself saying, “Man, bad luck just comes at me in waves!”  Ya, you sent out bad ripples my friend and they came back.

Successful people aren’t happy because they are successful, they were happy first.  They sent out the right ripples. They were on some level aware of the ripple effect,  how to stop negative ripples, and start positive ones.

It’s The Little Things Like

- shaking the hand of the person bagging your groceries

-letting someone in front of you in a line

-opening the door and actually smiling at someone

-having compassion for the overworked and underpaid waitress, customer service rep, ticket taker, etc.

-speaking to the manager of a store and working things out so that you can give a good review later

-spending time with an animal or child who needs attention and love

-telling the person at the drive through to put your change towards the car’s order in back of you

-stopping to help change a tire

-smiling patiently at a screaming baby and her sleep deprived mother

-texting someone randomly to tell them how much they mean to you

-lightening up a stressful situation with a cheerful comment or joke

-actively listening to someone who is having a hard time explaining their point of view

-surrounding yourself with positive people who also put out happy ripples

-consciously deciding you will not be a part of a negative ripple effect

And finally, my favorite mentioned at the beginning of my blog. Simply pray. Send someone a well wish, good vibes, whatever you do to pour your love into them.  I believe that the strongest ripples are the ones that come from your heart. You never know how those ripples will expand and change your entire world. One day you’ll wake up and feel the rebound of that love and wonder how life got so good!

Want more clarity? Check out my website at www.clarityistheway.com

Follow me on your favorite social media platforms @clarityistheway and don’t miss my LIVE periscopes every Wednesday noon MST for more positive ripples. 

Your Lens

What are you looking through?

Your lens is a term I use to describe the way you perceive yourself, your life, and the world around you. I use the example of wearing different glasses. If you wear the wrong prescription, or dark murky sunglasses, your vision is distorted, and therefore so is your experience. You may not be seeing things clearly, and this can be the cause of a lot of distress and discord in your life and relationships. 

I looked up the actual definition of perception and read: "A way of regarding, understanding, or interpreting something; a mental impression."

Simple enough, however I really appreciate how it is defined in A Course in Miracles: “Perception comes from projection: what we see inwardly determines what we see outside ourselves; crucial to perception, therefore, is our interpretation of “reality," rather than what seems to be objectively real.”

Have you ever had the experience of comparing stories to someone who was at the same event as you, and hear how different their perception of that event is from yours?  It is true that very seldom at all do we have the same exact experience as another person. This is due to the fact that we are all so different, and our thoughts, past experiences, and opinions are different. We are all wearing a different lens, and some people’s lenses can be clearer than others.

What distorts your lens? I believe the biggest distortion to our sight has to do with unforgiveness, grudges, and old unresolved pain. These things skew our sight and act as a mini movie projector into our present.

Examples:

1. Someone who still suffers the resentment from a past heart break will be looking through the lens of that heart break, and unfortunately they will only see that heart break in their current situation. Even though the current situation has nothing to do with the past, they will project their fears and unresolved issues into their present and future and looking through this lens of hurt, they will make poor decisions based on fear, react irrationally, and sabotage their future.  I pose this question regarding this type of lens: How can you recognize the love of your life if you’re seeing through the lens of your past hurt? They could be standing right in front of you and you would never see it!

2. The way you view yourself has a lot to do with how much love and success you will allow. If you are wearing the lens of “looser, fat, ugly, always late, messy, unworthy, poor, unhappy” than that is how you will conduct your life. You may be holding onto old self resentment and self judgment that takes away your ability to see yourself correctly. When you look at yourself in the mirror, or when you look at your life, because of yourself criticism, you may literally not be seeing yourself and your potential success clearly at all!

Change your lens, change your life.

Your lens won’t change itself. As long as you are unaware of the lens you see through, you will be doomed to wear it and life will go on the same.  Your choice is simply, “I could either continue to see the world through my current lens, or I could get clear and refocus.”

Another way to talk about your lens is if you were a lighthouse. Everyone has a light inside of them that, like a lighthouse, streams forth and into the world. This light is an expression of your highest potential, happiness, love, health, prosperity and success. The more lenses you have over your light, the less you will be able to shine. The world will never be touched by the light you have to offer. Inside of you, right now, is a light so strong and mighty that it could not only change your life, but the lives around you… maybe even the entire world! It’s time to wipe the slate clean and get very clear! 

How to Refocus & Get Clear

If your dirty lens is a product of your unresolved past, get rid of your past. Let it go. All its doing is distorting your view from the truth about your current life and who you are today. You are not the same person you were when your lens got dirty. Who do you need to forgive? What do you need to resolve? Clearing up your past and becoming peaceful is like Windex to the soul. You will shine sparkly and new and feel positively radiant!

Find your rose colored glasses and see through eyes of love.  See through eyes of newness.  See through today’s eyes.  Ask yourself “Who do I want to be today?” And begin to open yourself up to the truth of your life.  When you are wearing the right lens, your life will look beautiful and filled with wonders and miracles.

What lens would you like to wear today?

• For more ways on how to get clear, follow me on your favorite social media platforms.  @clarityistheway
• For more information on how you can work with me 1 on 1 or sign up to be in my 6 week mentorship, visit  my website at www.clarityistheway.com
• And don’t miss me LIVE every Wednesday noon MST on Periscope for your mid-week motivation! 

How to beautify your life TODAY.

It is officially autumn in the Northern Hemisphere where I live. This morning, I woke up. Thank goodness I woke up. My window was open. There was a crisp anticipation in the air that found my cheeks and nose that made me snuggle deeper into my blankets. But the persistent autumn air found my smile, lifted my eyelids anyway. I could hear birds busily building thicker nests, the preparation of colder mornings to come surrounding my home. Suddenly, the geese were on the move heading south, and their awkward song broke through the silence of my room. Something within me stirred. I sat up looking out at the falling flowers and leaves, and felt the promise of their return after winter. I began repeating my morning decree, allowing my mind and heart to work softly together, visualizing my day and to humbly pray. I was already feeling gratitude for my upcoming day as my feet found my furry black slippers and I padded across the hall to wake up my sweet sleeping child for school.

I begin to move through my day as if I were dancing on a stage in ballet slippers. As if my dream of being a ballerina as a child plays out without any resistance from my 37 year old self. I’m dancing between coaching calls, readings, writing, playing with my kitties, listening to music, kissing my lover, cooking for my family, walking my dog, laughing with girlfriends, and then there is always my new “favorite” book and taking time to be taught by my mentors. Yes, it all gets accomplished, the house gets wiped down, the laundry folded, bills get paid. Date nights, family time, it’s all in there. And I feel beautiful. I feel beauty while vacuuming my home, while picking up dog crap, I feel beauty in the stories I hear from my clients and seeing them take risks and make breakthroughs.   I feel beauty when the night tucks me in next to my sweetheart and I once again open my heart in gratitude.

How did a poor single mother who once felt ugly, used, worthless, and broken wake up this morning like this? How does a woman who had seemingly failed at business, relationships, and parenting smile at herself in the mirror and say sweetly to her reflection, “You really are beautiful.”  Is it possible to live with this sort of grace and ease?  The answer is in the steps I take every day to create balance and it all has to do with being very clear about my priorities, removing negativity, and choosing to believe in my worth. One of my favorite sayings is, “I know who I am, I know who’s I am.”  At some point I dedicated myself and my life to something greater than me. As I allow this greatness to move through me, I am blessed by the results you just read.  It takes time, forgiveness, and dedication. However if you’re willing to include these following steps into your day, you will see a difference; you may even choose to tell yourself you’re beautiful… and mean it.

1.       Decree your days.  Don’t allow the world to have its way with you. Set your intentions first thing in the morning, and then be flexible to positive or productive changes if needed. Decide how you would like to feel at the end of the day and then take steps to create that end result for yourself. You will sleep better feeling accomplished, even if it is for something small.

2.       Have an abundant mentality. Be grateful for what you have right now. Create for yourself a gratitude journal and write something in it every day. You feel ugly when you have a lack mentality, so beautify your mind by appreciating everything and everyone that is around you.  Trust that there is enough to go around, and that your gratitude will bring even more to you.

3.       Eat clean. You are what you eat. If you want to beautify your life, eat beautiful things. Make your plate look pretty, take time to add colors, herbs, spices. Greasy, brown, dull food will make you feel sluggish and ugly. There is an abundant rainbow of nutrients ready to give you energy and help you feel radiant!

4.       Let go of grudges. Forgiveness makes you pretty.  It also beautifies your reputation. What exactly do you want to be known for?  Toxic behavior that comes from grudges makes you ugly. Ask yourself who you’re really mad at. Take accountability. Resolve it! LET IT GO! Letting go of grudges makes you feel as light as air, and it will uplift your world.

5.       Stop comparing yourself to others. The only person you’re competing with is YOU. Raise your own bar. Be stubborn about your goal, but flexible about your method.  If you have something that’s not working, it isn’t because someone else is doing it better.  It’s because you haven’t found your win yet. Focus on yourself; leave everyone else out of it. When you do this, you are able to completely celebrate all of your accomplishments along the way without feeling rushed or not good enough. Celebrating your accomplishments is beautiful!

6.       Don’t talk about what you can’t do, talk about what you CAN do.  Complaining or being negative about your capabilities or skill set is super ugly. Giving yourself grace makes you glow.  When you are complaining, you are not creating. Stay optimistic, forward thinking and you will have the energy to learn and grow.

7.       Notice beautiful things and invite them into your space. One of the things I love is good music, and a good scene. The sky is literally painted for us at every sunset, and yet how many times do you stop and take it in? Put the sunset in your heart, put the stars in your eyes, and let the night wind brush your hair. These things make you beautiful. Make sure you have nature in your home. Plants, animals, crystals, fountains, candles, anything that balances the elements in your environment will make beauty around you.  Right now, look around you. What is beautiful?  Notice beauty. Notice yourself.

Clarity is beautiful. You can live a life of grace and ease when you make powerful decisions based on clarity.

www.clarityistheway.com for information about my 1 on 1 coaching sessions, angel readings, mentorship, and upcoming events.

Follow me on your favorite social media platforms @clarityistheway.

Periscope LIVE coaching every Wednesday at 12 noon MST.  @clarityistheway.

10 BeliefsThat Keep You From Succeeding

Once you identify these negative beliefs and eradicate them, your opportunity to be successful will greatly improve.

What is a negative belief? I like to use the acronym BS to break down how I view a system of beliefs that do not serve your success goals. (Belief Systems=BS). A belief is simply a thought that has been thought so much that you have an emotional tie to it.  If I think I’m ugly every day, and have an emotional tie to that thought, it will become a belief. Does that mean that my belief is correct? No. It’s BS. Someone else might think I’m pretty and that is their BS.

“But Crystal, how do we know who’s right in their BS?” I’ll go into BS in another blog, but for now here is something that will help you tell the difference. Truth is something that brings a sense of peace and solidity in the midst of a chaotic world filled with BS. Truth is not charged with negative emotion, instead it gives you strength, courage, and determination.

What I want you to know about your BS for now though is that you can’t fool anyone with them.  Your belief systems show up in everything you do, whether you want them to or not.  It is like the food you eat.  You can eat privately, but the food you choose to eat will show up on your body.  Just like your private belief systems, they will show up in your life. You can tell who takes care of themselves.  You can see someone’s BS if you watch how they live life.

Here are some common negative beliefs that can severely ruin your success. If you can get rid of this BS, you’ll be steps closer to attaining your goals.

1.       “Someone’s already thought of it, or is doing it.”  How many people are in this world? And you think you have to be the only one with the idea in order to execute it? The difference between you and everyone else is YOU!  So what if someone else “stole” your big idea? No one will do it the way that you do it. I used to be so intimidated by a certain female life coach who seemed to be living the life I wanted. Watching her grow made me feel like I was losing some sort of race to success. That was until I read Girl Code by Cara Alwill Leyba, who wrote these magic words:“Her success is not your failure.” The only reason I was intimidated was because I wasn’t going after my dream to be a life coach. Once I got the ball rolling, and took action, it was easy for me to look at the other woman with appreciation. I chose to be inspired rather than jealous. Now I look forward to her posts because she’s showing me what’s possible. And the best part is, I’m working my coaching practice completely different than she is because no one is like me.  No one will do it the way YOU do it.

2.       “They won’t like me, listen to me, they won’t care about me.” There is a common belief that you are fundamentally damaged or flawed.  I work a lot with people in my practice regarding this negative BS. When you feel flawed to your core, you won’t allow yourself to be happy or successful and you will sabotage your chances every time. It’s a fear that you’ll never be good enough and something that would take more than just this little blog to solve. However, I will leave you with this advice; In this day in age, it is hard not to find people who won’t listen to you. I mean, look at all the weird people who do have a following! “You’re never too weird for the world”- Bossbabe Alex. There is an admirer for every artist, a reader for every writer, a listener for every speaker. Even though you might not feel good enough, realize that most people don’t. You don’t have to cover up who you are. You don’t have to be fake or inauthentic, be yourself and those who understand you will support you!

3.       “That’s too much, I could never afford it.” You may have reason to think this, however when you say “I could never afford it,” you don’t even give yourself a chance for an opportunity to have it. Let me tell you what you can’t afford. You can’t afford NOT to make a move. My favorite saying to beat negative BS is “What if?” What if you could? Allow yourself to wonder. Wondering opens you up, it precedes ideas and inspiration.  Next time you see something you can’t afford, say to yourself, “I am open, what if?” And then give something to yourself. Be receptive. Prove that you can get stuff. If anything, give yourself grace, understanding, and compassion.  Give yourself love. That doesn’t cost a thing!

4.       “I will outshine someone if I am successful.” Who are you staying small for? Who are you afraid of intimidating if you grow into your success? That’s very kind of you darling but here’s the deal- Just like the life coach who intimidated me, if she hadn’t gone before me and shined her light so bright to trigger my insecurities, I’m not sure if I’d be here writing this blog today. Sometimes we need someone to step up their game so that it pushes us to do the same. Why not let it be you?  Step up your game so that someone can do the same.  

5.       “Life sucks.” Yes, life can suck sometimes. But how effective is your pity party? Who or what are you blaming for this life sucking? This is the most victim-like statement on the list. I want to smack people who go around saying “life sucks.” Everyone has a hard life. I was once a single mother in a one bedroom apartment living off of change in her sofa to take us to McDonalds dollar menu!  Life sucked, but I didn’t want it to stay like that so I took accountability for how I got there and slowly dug my way out. Expecting the outer world to change doesn’t work. No one’s going to save you. You have to jump in and stop it from sucking.

6.       “I’m too tired, not enough energy.” Let’s talk about where you’re losing energy. What is draining you? Is it the food you’re eating (or not eating)? Are you low in nutrients? Do you hate how you look in  clothes? Are you surrounded by people who drain you? Do you need healthy boundaries so that you can focus on yourself? Are you working a job you hate? What kind of drama is sucking the life out of you? Are you not taking time for yourself? Do you create time for fun? Do you delegate or do you do it all yourself? How many obligations are you involved in that you dislike? Are you mentally beating up on yourself? Is someone else beating up on you? How much of your day do you spend worrying or being stressed out? Are you watching too much TV? Too much social media? Do you create time to exercise? Do you go for walks? Do you spend time in nature? Do you sleep in too late? Do you stay up too late? Do you drink too much caffeine? Alcohol? Involved in other substances? How much BS is in your head? I think the answers to these questions are enough here.

7.       “I will fail.” My last blog was all about redefining failure. It’s such BS to believe you’re going to fail. There is no failing. There is just quitting. If you're going to fear anything, be afraid you’re going to quit, then work on that. 

8.       “I am not qualified or smart enough.” If I can personally open up here and say that this was a big one for me.  Being qualified is huge in my family. My dad drilled it into our heads to go to college.  I have since learned that drilling and encouraging are two separate things. I wanted nothing more than to go to college, however I was a teen mom who was trying to get by. I always knew I had great ideas, and that I had a special ability to assist people meet their goals, whether they were health related, relationship, or finances. I let the fact that I didn’t finish college get to me, and I played small until my 30’s. It wasn’t until I decided to get my certification in Life Coaching that I realized I was already qualified. Everything I learned from the coaching school were things I was already doing! I had read well over 25 self help books and dozens of spiritual books, and I applied what I could to my own life. Let this be a lesson to us all, that while having a piece of paper on your wall is great, and it shows commitment and determination, it doesn’t make you any greater than someone who has the natural ability to do their trade. When people tell me they feel unqualified, I ask them how many books they have read in their trade? I ask who their mentor is, who do they follow? I also ask them to tell me life experiences and ideas they have. The truth is that if you have a desire, you are qualified. Your passion is your qualification, and don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise!

9.       “I need (A) to happen first.  If it weren’t for (A), I’d be doing it.” Biggest excuse for not moving forward EVER! I used to think that my house had to be spotless and totally organized in order for me to write. Glad I’m not using that excuse anymore. I’m sitting here next to a basket of laundry that is happily waiting for my creative serge to complete this blog. What are you waiting for? Your circumstances will never be good enough for you to start, so just start. No more excuses.

10.   “Never.” I don’t really think I need to write anything here other than just stop saying that word. You know why.

3 ways to stop the BS.  

First of all, be aware of what you’re thinking.  Be aware of how you’re feeling.  So many people are numb to negativity because it’s their norm. But you can’t make changes until you chose to be sensitive. Your entire BS is just fear. And fear is not you.  Just because you’re hearing it in your head, doesn’t make it true.

Second, question what you’re thinking by asking yourself, “Is that true?”  I’ll use number 9 as an example: “I need (A) to happen before I do (fill in the blank).”  Is that true?  Do you really need something to happen before you get successful? Or is there something you can do right now, even a small step that would create movement and momentum?

Third, your BS shows up in your results.  What kinds of results are you getting in your love life, your career, your home life, your social life, your finances, your spiritual life, and all other areas?  Your unwanted or disappointing results are the tell tale sign that you have BS. By looking at your results, you can identify how you’re limiting yourself due to your inner thoughts, and that it is time to make a change.

Of course, it’s easy to make changes when you are 100% clear. Remember that you can live an abundant life of grace and ease when you make powerful decisions based on CLARITY.

Check me out at www.clarityistheway.com

I'm looking forward to meeting up with you on Periscope every Wednesday for your LIVE Mid-Week Motivation. Follow me @clarityistheway